We've All Got Battle Scars
by only-some-loser
Summary: Nikki returns, but it's not the happy reunion Mac dreamed of. Instead he gets old scars ripped open once again. Good thing Jack is there to pick up the pieces. (title from Battle Scars by Paradise Fears)


First off, I am sorry I've been absent for so long. A combination of stress, lack of motivation, and a mental breakdown are the cause. I promised this story to helloyesimhere forever ago, and I am so deeply sorry that I've made her wait so long. So this is dedicated to you, helloyesimhere. She's amazing, and she deserves all the love in the world. I hope you enjoy this. I've worked on it on and off for months, so it should be really good, but I feel like I could do better. Sadly, I don't really know how to make it better at the moment. Maybe one day I'll go back and rewrite this, but we'll see. Only the mistakes are mine. I apologize if anyone seems out of character. I hope to write more for the MacGyver fandom throughout the season, but I'm pretty confident that my next fic will be for Kingsman, being as how that is my current hyper fixation. Please tell me what you think!

* * *

Nikki couldn't believe it had gone as smoothly as it did. She couldn't believe they bought it. She couldn't believe Mac actually believed that she loved him. Her performance was Oscar worthy in her eyes. She smirked to herself as she walked out of the Phoenix Foundation, Mac once again firmly under her spell. Soon enough, everything would come together, and the Phoenix Foundation would be burned to the ground.

X Months Later

Things hadn't gone quite the way Nikki had anticipated. She had underestimated Riley's skills as a hacker, and how much Phoenix had improved their security since the Organization's last attempt at tearing it down. That being said, Nikki had been completely successful in one aspect of her mission: she was about to kill MacGyver.

Nikki watched as Mac came running into the lab to get whatever chemicals he needed to stop whatever the Organization had done - she wasn't entirely sure herself what they had done upstairs, only that they assured her that Mac would have to go down to the lab alone, and that was good enough for her. Before he could grab anything, Nikki decided to make her presence known; after all, she couldn't just shoot him without letting him know it was her first, and having to fully come to realize that he had been tricked by her yet again. Her pride wouldn't allow for it.

"Mac!" she shouted out frantically as she ran over to him and straight into his arms, playing the part of the damsel in distress, knowing that Mac's protective instincts would stall whatever plans he had had.

"Nikki? What are you doing here?" he asked in reply, holding her in his arms nonetheless.

"Oh Mac," she cried. "I couldn't leave without letting you know. I just couldn't," she said, forcing herself to sound close to tears as she gripped the back of Mac's shirt.

"Let me know what? What's going on?"

"That it was me," she said, breaking her grip on Mac and pulling a gun on him at the same time.

"Woah, Nikki, I don't know what you're doing, but stop."

Mac held his hands up and look at her with the love in his eyes that he'd always had for her. No matter what happened, he'd never stopped loving her.

"Whatever's going on, let me help you. I want to help you. Isn't that what a relationship is built on? Put the gun down, and we'll figure this out. Together," he implored.

Nikki had been struggling to keep a straight face ever since she had run into Mac's arms. Now, she just lost it, as Mac stared at her incredulously.

"Oh Mac," she managed to get out between cackles. "For being so smart, you sure are stupid."

"What are you talking about? Nikki put down the gun. Please," he continued.

"You just don't get it do you Mac? Not even I thought I was that good of an actress. But no matter what happened, you never lost faith in me. That was your first mistake. I would say it was all me, but you're the one who was dumb enough to believe me. All that about me still loving you was just the cherry on top. How could I love you Mac? How could anyone ever love you?" she asked, as if the mere thought was utterly baffling.

Mac was silent, but looked at Nikki in confusion.

"You just don't get. I was _using_ you Mac. I never loved you. I only loved your body. I just needed to get close enough to you to take down Phoenix, and you. All those times we were 'intimate' were just some extra fun on the side. I just couldn't believe you actually bought it. No one loves you Mac. Haven't you noticed that everyone leaves you? Your mom died to get away from you, same as your grandpa, Thornton left not that long ago, and dear old daddy just up and left when you were a kid. You thought he loved you, but he was sick of you. How long do you think it's gonna be before Jack does the same?" she continued with a cruel smile.

"No!" Mac protested. "Jack would never leave. I know what you're trying to do, but it won't work. I know Jack better than anyone, and I know he would never leave."

Nikki sighed.

"Who knows Mac, maybe you're right. It's a shame that you'll never get to find out-"

"Nikki! Put the gun down!" came the booming voice of Jack Dalton.

She quickly turned her aim from Mac to Jack.

"This doesn't concern you Jack," she said.

"That's where you're wrong missy. See now you're pointing a gun at my partner, and now at me. That definitely concerns me. You've got two options. Option one, you put down the gun, and we talk this out. Option two, I shoot you, and you die."

Nikki didn't buy it. Jack may be well versed in killing, but he would never kill someone he once considered a friend.

"Too bad Jack. The mission comes first."

With those final words, Nikki swung her aim back to Mac, and two gunshots sounded. A shout of pain was heard, and a body hit the ground.

* * *

Jack couldn't believe it had come to this. He would be lying if he said that he didn't have suspicions that Nikki really was dirty, but he never for a second believed that it would all end with Nikki dead by his hand.

Jack quickly snapped out of his musings and ran over to his injured partner.

"Mac!" he shouted. Jack tore off his button up and pressed it against the GSW on Mac's shoulder. The blonde's breathing sped up as he gazed over at the dead body of the woman he loved.

"Nikki?" he asked, but it came out as a whisper.

"I'm so sorry kiddo. I'm so sorry. Just don't look alright? Paramedics will be here soon buddy," he said, stepping between Mac and Nikki.

Jack took a glance back at Nikki's body. A single tap to the head. Maybe he could've just winged her, and that would have been enough, but there were no taking chances with Mac. Maybe if it hadn't been Mac whose life was on the line, he would've taken that chance, but the fact of the matter was that it was Mac, and there wasn't nothing Jack could do to bring Nikki back now.

"Jack? What's going on down there? Our medical staff will be down immediately," came the voice of Matty Weber through Jack's com.

"I'll explain everything later. My boy needs me right now," Jack replied, ripping out his earwig and tossing it away. Mac needed his full, undivided attention, not Matty.

Jack continued to hold his now bloody shirt against Mac's wound, and did everything he could to hold Mac's gaze. The kid looked to be in shock about it. Jack tried talking to him, but he was pretty sure he was wasn't hearing a word he said.

A moment later, paramedics were racing into the room, and pulling Mac away from him. Of course, Jack followed them. He knew he would need to be by Mac's side for a long time after this.

X Days Later

The following days weren't as hard for Mac as Jack had expected. Between surgery to remove the bullet, which had become lodged in the bone of Mac's shoulder, days in the hospital, physical therapy, and watching Bruce Willis movies with Jack, Mac hardly had any time at all to think about Nikki's final betrayal, ugly words, and ultimate demise. Although some would count this as a blessing, Jack knew that the dam would break eventually, and soon. He just needed to make sure he was there when it happened to pick up the pieces.

Mac, of course, for all his efforts, had failed to convince Jack that he was fine. Anyone who knew the blonde could tell he wasn't. He was barely holding himself together. Who wouldn't be? He had lost a woman that he truly loved, that he had seen a possible future with, been betrayed yet again by said woman, and had age old wounds ripped open once again. Of course he wasn't okay.

When the dam finally broke, it was a sunny Saturday afternoon. Bozer and Riley were off seeing the new Kingsman movie - being in their profession, seeing all spy movies was a must - and Jack had a dentist appointment. Mac had been invited to join Bozer and Riley, but had claimed he was too deep into a project to take the time to go see a spy movie.

Jack would later take it as miracle that he had gotten the date wrong of his dentist appointment. It was too late to go to the movie, but perfect to surprise Mac with his favorite beer and let him talk about his project as much as he wanted. He didn't even know what Mac's project was.

He would later learn there was no project.

Upon Jack's arrival at Mac's house, the place was silent. Not a single tinkering sound could be heard. That was a bit odd. Usually Jack would have been able to hear at least something. But it wasn't quite odd enough to cause any alarm. Yet.

"Mac?" Jack called out. Most of the lights were off, leaving Jack no indication as to where his blonde partner was.

There was no reply.

He started by going out to the deck. Sometimes Mac liked some fresh air to help him think. This didn't seem to be one of those times, since the kid wasn't out there. Calling out Mac's name again, Jack continued to search through the house, with no sign of Mac, and no sign of any kind of struggle. After Jack had cleared the whole house, he went to check the garage. Perhaps his friend had simply left to go find some strange part for whatever he was working on.

The lights were off, but Mac was there, sitting against his dad's old classic car, his head against his knees. Mac periodically tuned it up, but it had been fine for a while.

"Hey buddy, you okay?" Jack cautiously asked. Mac wasn't looking at him, and showed no indication that he knew Jack had even walked into the garage.

The blonde was silent, but raised his head just enough to lock eyes with Jack. He may not have voiced anything, but his eyes said volumes. Sorrow. Grief. Doubt.

Jack took that as his cue, and walked over to his partner. It broke his heart to see the kid like this, no matter what had caused it. Mac had a heart of gold, and so many people so often took advantage of that. Jack had a feeling that he knew what the reason behind this was.

Sitting down right next to Mac, Jack could feel the blonde lean into him just a little bit, just enough for him to know he did it. The two sat in silence for a few minutes, neither one looking at each other. Jack just wanted to let Mac know he was there, and not going anywhere. It wasn't until Jack heard Mac's shuddering intake of breath that he decided to end the silence.

"Alright bud, it's time we talk about this. You're never this quiet or still for this long, and I'm not gonna lie, it's startin' to scare me a bit," he said with a nervous smile. "You can always talk to me about anything. You know that. And since you're so freakin' smart, you know it's best to talk about it, because that's what's healthy, as you always tell me."

A minute passed.

"Nikki."

Mac said nothing else, but Jack had figured as much in the first place. He knew how much this had to be hurting the kid. He had truly loved her, no matter what had happened. It didn't matter that she had betrayed them multiple times. If you truly love someone, you always do. Jack understood that, so he understood the pain Mac must have been feeling from her death.

"I know kid, I know, and I'm so sorry. I would do anything to bring her back-"

"No! That's not it. I mean, of course I miss her and it hurts, but I get it. She betrayed us again, and taking her out was your only option. I understand, and I'm working through that okay."

He paused.

"It's what she said," he whispered. "She was right."

Jack could barely hear what Mac said, but he did, though he wished he hadn't. He could remember Nikki's cruel words to his young partner, and even thinking about it made his stomach drop. Mac was none of the things Nikki had said. He was good, and pure, and worthy of all the love in the world.

"No, kid, no she wasn't-"

"But she was Jack," Mac cut him off again. "Everyone always leaves me. Nikki just further proved that. Half my family died, and the rest left me. Thornton betrayed us, Nikki betrayed us again and again, and I never saw it. I was too blinded by my feelings for her to see what she was doing. She said it herself that she never loved me, that it was all an act, that she only liked it when we were physical, that she was just using me-"

"Okay kid stop it right there." Now it was Jack's turn to interrupt. Mac was rambling, and that was never a good thing when it came to the kid's emotions. "Not a single word of that is true. Your mom and grandpa? You know they couldn't control what happened to them, and you know that they loved you more than anything in the world. They fought as hard as they could to stay with you, and you know that. I know that you have these unfounded doubts about yourself, which you shouldn't, but don't let those doubts belittle how hard your momma and grandpa fought for you. Now your pops? He had his own pile of crap that he was going through, and he didn't handle it well at all. He never should have left you, but he didn't leave because of you. Are you hearin' me Mac? Him leaving was not your fault. It was never your fault. And Thornton? You know that whole mess isn't even all sorted out yet, but no matter what, I can guarantee that she loves you too. I don't buy for a second that Thornton ever willingly put us in danger. I'll admit, Nikki was just a jerk, sorry man. There was something wrong with her. There would have to be in order for her to not see how amazing you are boy. Everyone else can see it. Matty, Bozer, Riley, even Cage. They all see it. And don't you dare forget how I see it too."

By the time Jack finished, Mac was finally looking at him. Jack held eye contact with him, and his heart continued to break for the kid. Mac didn't deserve any of this crap he was always getting.

The blonde looked away again as his eyes watered.

"But for how long? You'll be gone too one day."

"Not on your life boy. Now I don't usually like to get all lovey-dovey or anything, but I don't think you understand how important you are to me, so I'm gonna break my own rules. That in and off itself should show how much I care."

Mac rolled his eyes, but didn't say anything.

"Dude you're not only my partner, you're my best friend. You've always got my back, and I'm always gonna have yours. It's my friggin' job to have yours. There's no one in the world I would rather hang out with than you. But you're also the little brother I never had, and dude, I'm gonna be straight up real with you, you're like a son to me too. Ever since meeting you out in the desert, I've wanted to protect you, and help you grow. As much as I hate to admit it, you don't need my protection, and you've grown from a scrawny kid to an incredible man that I would be proud to call my son." Now it was Jack's eyes that were watering with emotion. "Don't you ever think that I would ever leave you. I love you man, and if you need me to get all emotional so that can get through to that big brain of yours, I'm willing to do that. I'm not leaving you, ever." He took a breath. "Ever."

Jack didn't give Mac a chance to respond. He grabbed the kid and pulled him into a deep hug, and just held him for a minute. The blonde didn't say anything, but he didn't try to end the embrace either. Maybe this was just what he needed. This closeness. But no matter what it was, Jack would always be there. It may not have been over, but Jack would be there until the bitter end.


End file.
